Calvary Distinctives

Servant Leadership School

January 19, 2003

Grace Upon Grace (ch.5)

Illustration

THE BARBER

After twenty years of shaving himself every morning, a man in a small Southern town decided he had enough. He told his wife that he intended to let the local barber shave him each day. He put on his hat and coat and went to the barber shop, which was owned by the pastor of the town’s Baptist Church. The barber’s wife, Grace, was working that day, so she performed the task. Grace shaved him and sprayed him with lilac water, and said, “That will be $20.” The man thought the price was a bit high, but he paid the bill and went to work. The next morning the man looked in the mirror, and his face was as smooth as it had been when he left the barber shop the day before. Not bad, he thought. At least I don’t need to get a shave every day. The next morning, the man’s face was still smooth. Two weeks later, the man was still unable to find any trace of whiskers on his face. It was more than he could take, so he returned to the barber shop. “I thought $20 was high for a shave”, he told the barber’s wife, “but you must have done a great job. It’s been two weeks and my whiskers still haven’t started growing back.” The expression on her face didn’t even change, expecting his comment. She responded, “You were shaved by Grace. Once shaved, always shaved.”

Why is it important that we learn to forgive others?

I think it was an interesting point that Chuck made regarding the Lord’s prayer.  The one point Jesus expanded upon was forgiveness:

(Mat 6:14-15 KJV)  For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: {15} But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.

We need to forgive others because God has forgiven us so much.

Matt. 18 – the servant was forgiven the huge debt.  He should have passed that forgiveness on to others.
(Eph 4:32 KJV)  And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.

Not allowing “grievance stories” to cloud our reasoning and our counsel to forgive.

Sometimes people can do a real good job telling us about the horrible time they’ve gone through and how some certain person has been so unfair to them.
We can tend to get caught up in the pain of their problem and not realize that we ought to be nudging them towards forgiveness.  But what happens is that we help the person feel more secure in carrying a grudge instead of forgiving.
I found some interesting examples about people who have learned to forgive.
Illustration
On the evening of April 25, 1958, a young Korean exchange student, a leader in student Christian affairs in the University of Pennsylvania, left his flat and went to the corner to post a letter to his parents in Pusan. Turning from the mailbox he stepped into the path of eleven leather-jacketed teenage boys. Without a word they attacked him, beating him with a blackjack, a lead pipe and with their shoes and fists. Later, when the police found him in the gutter, he was dead. All Philadelphia cried out for vengeance. The district attorney secured legal authority to try the boys as adults so that those found guilty could be given the death penalty. Then a letter arrived from Korea that made everyone stop and think. It was signed by the parents and by twenty other relatives of the murdered boy. It read in part:
“Our family has met together and we have decided to petition that the most generous treatment possible within the laws of your government be given to those who have committed this criminal action--.In order to give evidence of our sincere hope contained in this petition, we have decided to save money to start a fund to be used for the religious, educational, vocational, and social guidance of the boys when they are released--.We have dared to express our hope with a spirit received from the gospel of our Savior Jesus Christ who died for our sins.”

A. Leonard Griffith, Beneath the Cross of Jesus

Illustration
Yemen: missionaries forgive the murderers of their 3 colleagues “Following the murder of three American missionaries Martha Myers, Bill Koehn and Kathy Gariety on 30th December 2002 in a Christian hospital in Yibla, Yemen, their colleagues are more convinced than ever that God is doing something in the hearts of Yemenis,” reports the Baptist mission agency International Mission Board. Several hundred Yemenis attended the funeral in Yibla, and lined the streets for half a mile. “Something is happening in my heart,” said one of the Yemenis. “That is my father,” said one of the Yemeni hospital staff at Bill Koehn’s funeral. According to some reports, Martha Koehn, his widow, wants to remain in Yemen to encourage Yemenis mourning her husband’s death. The murdered missionaries’ colleagues say that they mourn their friends, but forgive the murderer. “The Christian hospital in Yibla is known not only for excellent medical care, but also, and more importantly, for unconditional love,” says staff member Lee Hixon. “Jesus’ call to take the Gospel to the suffering has far more weight than the risk of living in a nation such as Yemen. If you had asked these missionaries whether they were prepared to sacrifice their lives to see Christian churches planted in Yemen, they would all have answered ‘of course!’” says Hixon.
Source: Baptist Press, www.bpnews.net

The need for repentance

There are times when we simply need to forgive another person, whether they’re repentant or not.

We do this because Jesus told us we need to forgive others.
We do this because it’s healthy.

Grace doesn’t mean that we don’t deal with problems.

Sometimes we confuse grace with tolerance of sin – don’t

Sometimes a person’s problem will require that we be a little firm.

Calvary Chapels do exert discipline – this surprises some people.
We have had to remove people twice from the church. We have asked people to step down from ministries because of sin.
But the whole goal of discipline is to encourage a person to repent. And when they repent, we must restore.
(Gal 6:1 KJV)  Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted.

Erring on the side of grace rather than on the side of judgment.

We’re going to make mistakes in how we handle situations.  I think it preferable that we would err on the side of grace rather than on the side of judgment.

Critical attitudes towards others

How we view other churches – judging others
(Rom 14:4 KJV) Who art thou that judgest another man's servant? to his own master he standeth or falleth. Yea, he shall be holden up: for God is able to make him stand.
How we view each other
Do we treat each other with grace?  Are we surprised when we find out that people in church aren’t perfect?
I find a disturbing attitude where we say, “I’m just not going to put up with this any more”.  I think modern psychology has taught us that we should be assertive and not let other people dictate what’s going to happen in our lives.  But we need to leave room for patience and grace.

Balance on many of the controversial issues

Not just for sake of numbers, keeping people in your church.

Keeping a Biblical balance on issues – we believe a balance because we believe the Bible presents the same balance.

The Priority of the Word (ch.6)

Dave Dunagan