2Samuel 13-14

Thursday Evening Bible Study

July 26, 2012

Introduction

Do people see Jesus? Is the gospel preached? Does it speak to the broken hearted? Does it build up the church? Milk – Meat – Manna Preach for a decision Is the church loved?

David has sinned. He committed adultery with Bathsheba and then killed her husband Uriah in order to cover it up. But God knew. God sent the prophet Nathan to confront David, and David quit trying to cover his sin and instead turned to God to confess his sin.

God forgave David, but there would still be consequences to David’s sin. We’re about to start into the section where the consequences begin to come.

As we’ve mentioned before, David already has several wives, now at least eight. (Michal, Ahinoam, Abigail, Maacah, Haggith, Abital, Eglah, and Bathsheba).

Some of the problems we’re going to run into revolve around the fact that many of David’s children are only partially related to each other. They all have David as their father, but they will have different mothers. Sounds like the super-sized blended family.

13:1-14 Tamar’s Rape

:1 After this Absalom the son of David had a lovely sister, whose name was Tamar; and Amnon the son of David loved her.

:1 Absalom the son of David

Absalom is the third son of David.

His mother was Maacah, who was a princess, a daughter of the king of Geshur, Talmai.

His name means “my father is peace”.

:1 lovelyyapheh – fair, beautiful, handsome

:1 TamarTamar – “palm tree”

Her grandfather is the king of Geshur.

:1 Amnon the son of David

He is the oldest son of David.  We would call him the “crown prince”.  He is the logical first son to succeed David on the throne of Israel.

His name means “faithful”.

His mother was Ahinoam from Jezreel, in northern Israel.

:1 lovedahab – to love; human love, family, sexual; for things; love for God; God’s love toward man

It’s very much like our English word for “love”.  It can mean lots of kinds of “love”.

:2 Amnon was so distressed over his sister Tamar that he became sick; for she was a virgin. And it was improper for Amnon to do anything to her.

:2 he became sick

Lesson

Confronting lust

We’re going to see that Amnon’s “love” for Tamar is probably better described by us as “lust”.
It’s a strong desire that is going to cause lots of trouble and heartache.
It was not right for Amnon to “do anything” to her for a couple of reasons:
He really just wants sex, and he is not married to this girl.

The Bible says that sex outside of the blessing of marriage is just wrong.

(1 Co 6:18 NKJV) Flee sexual immorality. Every sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body.

He is the girl’s half-brother.

(Le 18:9 NKJV) The nakedness of your sister, the daughter of your father, or the daughter of your mother, whether born at home or elsewhere, their nakedness you shall not uncover.

So what do you do with thoughts that are about something that’s just “wrong”?
Amnon is going to let these thoughts harbor in his mind until they have made him sick.  He is eventually going to act out on them.
James writes,

(Jas 1:14–15 NKJV) —14 But each one is tempted when he is drawn away by his own desires and enticed. 15 Then, when desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, brings forth death.

Do you recognize that some of your “desires” are wrong?

Nip it in the bud.  It’s easier on you if you learn to deal with those desires early on, than let them cook and stew inside of your mind.

Learn to change your thinking.

:3 But Amnon had a friend whose name was Jonadab the son of Shimeah, David’s brother. Now Jonadab was a very crafty man.

:3 Jonadab – “Yahweh is willing”

He is a nephew to David and a cousin to Amnon. (and you thought your family was messed up!)

:3 craftychakam – wise, wise (man); skilful (in technical work); shrewd, crafty, cunning, wily, subtle

Lesson

Good friends

In the end, we have to face the consequences of our own decisions and actions, but having good friends can help us make the right decisions and take the right actions.
Jonadab is trouble.
He is a smart cookie, but “smart” isn’t always “right”.
His personal philosophy is:

Expediency, not morality

What kind of influence do your friends have on you?
 Do they encourage us to follow the Lord, or do they encourage us to follow the flesh?
(1 Co 15:33 NASB) Do not be deceived: “Bad company corrupts good morals.”

Ideally, our friendships with ungodly people ought to be about us influencing them – be we need to be realistic when the influence is going the wrong way.

:4 And he said to him, “Why are you, the king’s son, becoming thinner day after day? Will you not tell me?” Amnon said to him, “I love Tamar, my brother Absalom’s sister.”

:5 So Jonadab said to him, “Lie down on your bed and pretend to be ill. And when your father comes to see you, say to him, ‘Please let my sister Tamar come and give me food, and prepare the food in my sight, that I may see it and eat it from her hand.’ ”

:5 let my sister Tamar come

This is not good advice.

Illustration

Good Advice:
The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans.
On the other hand, the French eat a lot of fat and also suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans.
The Japanese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans.
The Italians drink excessive amounts of red wine and also suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans.
Conclusion:
Eat and drink what you like. It’s speaking English that kills you

:6 Then Amnon lay down and pretended to be ill; and when the king came to see him, Amnon said to the king, “Please let Tamar my sister come and make a couple of cakes for me in my sight, that I may eat from her hand.”

Cakes – think pancakes or tortillas

:7 And David sent home to Tamar, saying, “Now go to your brother Amnon’s house, and prepare food for him.”

:8 So Tamar went to her brother Amnon’s house; and he was lying down. Then she took flour and kneaded it, made cakes in his sight, and baked the cakes.

:9 And she took the pan and placed them out before him, but he refused to eat. Then Amnon said, “Have everyone go out from me.” And they all went out from him.

:10 Then Amnon said to Tamar, “Bring the food into the bedroom, that I may eat from your hand.” And Tamar took the cakes which she had made, and brought them to Amnon her brother in the bedroom.

:11 Now when she had brought them to him to eat, he took hold of her and said to her, “Come, lie with me, my sister.”

:12 But she answered him, “No, my brother, do not force me, for no such thing should be done in Israel. Do not do this disgraceful thing!

:12 no such thing should be done in Israel

She might be talking about the law against a brother and sister having sex.

It’s more likely that she’s talking about the subject of rape or pre-marital sex.

(Dt 22:28–29 NKJV) —28 “If a man finds a young woman who is a virgin, who is not betrothed, and he seizes her and lies with her, and they are found out, 29 then the man who lay with her shall give to the young woman’s father fifty shekels of silver, and she shall be his wife because he has humbled her; he shall not be permitted to divorce her all his days.

He is disgraceful by forcing this instead being a gentleman.

:13 And I, where could I take my shame? And as for you, you would be like one of the fools in Israel. Now therefore, please speak to the king; for he will not withhold me from you.”

:13 he will not withhold me from you

Perhaps Tamar is saying that she thinks David might be willing to go against the Law of Moses and give Tamar to Amnon as a wife.

It could be that she is saying this only to try and talk Amnon out of raping her.

:14 However, he would not heed her voice; and being stronger than she, he forced her and lay with her.

:14 he forced her

They say “be careful what you wish for”.  You might get it. And it might not be what you think.

Antiochus, the son of Seleucus lusted for his mother in law Stratonice. To cure him of this lust, his father gave him what he wanted. (John Gill)

Lesson

Real Love

This is not the right kind of “love”.
(1 Co 13:4–7 NLT) —4 Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud 5 or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. 6 It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. 7 Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.
Amnon does not “love” Tamar, he “lusts” for her.
If a person claims to be in “love” with you, yet they are pushing you to do something you know is wrong, then we have a problem.
The right kind of love is focused on what is right.
The right kind of love is willing to wait.

13:15-22 Response to rape

:15 Then Amnon hated her exceedingly, so that the hatred with which he hated her was greater than the love with which he had loved her. And Amnon said to her, “Arise, be gone!”

:16 So she said to him, “No, indeed! This evil of sending me away is worse than the other that you did to me.” But he would not listen to her.

She’s thinking that he shouldn’t just have sex with her and not marry her.  He was only interested in sex.

:17 Then he called his servant who attended him, and said, “Here! Put this woman out, away from me, and bolt the door behind her.”

:15 Amnon hated her

Lesson

True Lust

This is very typical of a relationship built on lust. His attraction to her was purely physical, and after he was satisfied, his real feelings about her surface.
A guy who is pressuring a girl into a physical relationship doesn’t love her. He is only thinking of himself.
Even when a girl gives in, and afterwards the guy says he still loves her, that doesn’t make it a healthy love.
Love waits until its right.
That’s the basis of “fidelity” or “trust”

I know that I can trust you after we get married to say “no” to other temptations (like sex with other people) because you were able to make right choices before we got married.

:18 Now she had on a robe of many colors, for the king’s virgin daughters wore such apparel. And his servant put her out and bolted the door behind her.

:19 Then Tamar put ashes on her head, and tore her robe of many colors that was on her, and laid her hand on her head and went away crying bitterly.

:19 tore her robe

I find it interesting that instead of trying to hide what has happened, she openly displays that bad things have happened to her.

She is no longer a virgin daughter of the king.

Lesson

Purity’s treasure

Our society doesn’t even get it.
God is the creator of sex, and He created it to be enjoyed within the boundaries of marriage. He designed it to function at it’s best when it is between two people who truly love each other. And God’s idea of love in marriage is a lifelong commitment and trust.
Because of this, maintaining virginity until marriage is a great, great blessing to that marriage.
Illustration
I’ve heard Dr. Dobson explain it as if a person’s sexual nature was worth a million bucks. Every time you have sex with another person, you are taking half of your treasure and giving it to them. When you are married to that person, the treasure stays within the family. But when you are not married to that person, you’ve just lost a half of your fortune, and the value of your sexual nature is now worth a half a million. When you have sex with another person, it’s now worth a quarter of a million dollars. And when it goes on and on, sex becomes something cheap and filthy, instead of priceless and beautiful.
Virginity is a treasure. Faithfulness to your marriage is priceless.
I can see a new Master Card commercial:  Cost of the wedding chapel:  $500.  Cost of the Bridal Gown:  $1500.  Cost of the reception:  $10,000.  Cost of purity and faithfulness:  Priceless.

:20 And Absalom her brother said to her, “Has Amnon your brother been with you? But now hold your peace, my sister. He is your brother; do not take this thing to heart.” So Tamar remained desolate in her brother Absalom’s house.

Absalom had apparently heard of Amnon’s request. He now sees Tamar’s ashes, torn robe, and her tears. He puts two and two together.

:20 Tamar remained desolate

Tamar never married.

:21 But when King David heard of all these things, he was very angry.

:22 And Absalom spoke to his brother Amnon neither good nor bad. For Absalom hated Amnon, because he had forced his sister Tamar.

:21 David heard of all these things

David knew what had happened.  This had not been hidden from him.  Yet all he apparently does is just get mad.

Lesson

Trouble and Response

There’s an area in my life I’m trying to pay more attention to, learn more about, and try to do better with:  Conflict Resolution.
How do you deal with conflict?  How do you deal with problems around you?
Both David and Absalom respond by not responding.
David gets angry, but does nothing about it.
Absalom hates Amnon, but doesn’t talk about it.
I can certainly understand David’s place.
Sometimes you just don’t know how to respond to a situation, and sometimes it’s better not to respond than to respond in the wrong way.
It could be that David can’t stand to think of what he should be doing.  As king, he’s the one that should be enforcing the Law:
(Le 20:17 NKJV) —17 ‘If a man takes his sister, his father’s daughter or his mother’s daughter, and sees her nakedness and she sees his nakedness, it is a wicked thing. And they shall be cut off in the sight of their people. He has uncovered his sister’s nakedness. He shall bear his guilt.

Being “cut off” could be taken to mean banishment or it could mean death. I imagine that neither of those seem acceptable to David.

It could be that David is thinking of his own life.
We don’t know that he actually “forced” himself on Bathsheba, but he did commit adultery and tried to cover it up with murder. And God spared his life. How could he turn around and have his own son put to death?
The problem is that David’s inaction will bring about a simmering bitterness in Absalom, one that will result in murder.

13:23-39 Absalom’s Revenge

:23 And it came to pass, after two full years, that Absalom had sheepshearers in Baal Hazor, which is near Ephraim; so Absalom invited all the king’s sons.

:23 two full years

Lesson

Long Grudges

Sometimes when you are having a conflict with another person, it’s okay to let things cool down.
Sometimes things can be more easily resolved if you let the emotions cool off.
But if you wait too long, bitterness grows.
Paul says,
(Eph 4:26–27 NKJV) —26 “Be angry, and do not sin”: do not let the sun go down on your wrath, 27 nor give place to the devil.

I don’t think this means you need to resolve every problem before midnight.

I’ve known people who took this so literally that they would stay up late into the night arguing in order to do this.

Yet the longer you wait to resolve things, the creepier things get.

People’s recollections change.

We tend to only remember certain things, and we mistakenly remember other things.

We remember things that make us feel justified in our position.

The other person does the same thing.

The longer you wait, the stranger things will become and the harder it will be to resolve things.

:23 sheepshearers in Baal Hazor

The time for shearing sheep was normally a time of celebration and partying.

Play Baal Hazor map video.

Baal Hazor is about fifteen miles north of Jerusalem.  It’s a good day’s journey from home.
When David had heard the Nabal was shearing his sheep, he had sent messengers hoping to get some doggy bags of extra food for David’s men (1Sam. 25:7).
Where there is sheep shearing, there is a party.

:24 Then Absalom came to the king and said, “Kindly note, your servant has sheepshearers; please, let the king and his servants go with your servant.”

:25 But the king said to Absalom, “No, my son, let us not all go now, lest we be a burden to you.” Then he urged him, but he would not go; and he blessed him.

It sounds like an innocent and generous invitation.  David declines.  I wonder if Absalom expects David to decline, and this is part of the plan.

:26 Then Absalom said, “If not, please let my brother Amnon go with us.” And the king said to him, “Why should he go with you?”

I wonder if David suspects something.  Why would Absalom make a point of inviting Amnon, with whom everyone knows he’s angry with.

:27 But Absalom urged him; so he let Amnon and all the king’s sons go with him.

:28 Now Absalom had commanded his servants, saying, “Watch now, when Amnon’s heart is merry with wine, and when I say to you, ‘Strike Amnon!’ then kill him. Do not be afraid. Have I not commanded you? Be courageous and valiant.”

Amnon will be less of a problem when he’s drunk. 

Absalom is saying that he will take all the blame for this.

:29 So the servants of Absalom did to Amnon as Absalom had commanded. Then all the king’s sons arose, and each one got on his mule and fled.

Illustration

A panda walks into a diner, sits down, and orders a sandwich. He eats the sandwich, pulls out a gun, and shoots out the restaurant’s windows. As the panda stands up to go, the owner shouts, “Hey! Where are you going? You just shot out my windows and you didn’t pay for your sandwich!” The panda yells back at the owner, “Hey man, I’m a PANDA! Look it up!” The owner opens his dictionary and sees the following definition for “panda”: “A tree dwelling marsupial of Asian origin, characterized by distinct black and white coloring… …Eats shoots and leaves.”

I guess Absalom is acting a bit like a Panda…

:30 And it came to pass, while they were on the way, that news came to David, saying, “Absalom has killed all the king’s sons, and not one of them is left!”

:30 Absalom has killed all the king’s sons

Lesson

Wrong information

Sometimes the news isn’t always correct, fair, or balanced.
Whenever there is a big news event, you can bet that the first hour worth of reports is not going to be very accurate.  We all get that.
Yet sometimes when “news” comes from some other source, we just assume it’s accurate.  Not true.
Sometimes people don’t know the whole truth.  Some people even lie about what has happened.
(Pr 18:13 NKJV) He who answers a matter before he hears it, It is folly and shame to him.
When you hear “bad” news, it’s a good idea to make sure that you are actually hearing real accurate news.
What would you do if you heard that “Pastor Rich was arrested last week for drunk driving”?
There’s something inside of us that likes to hear bad news like that.  There’s something inside of us that even wants to be the first one to tell others about the bad news we just heard.  Sometimes we hear things and just get angry.  Be careful about those kinds of reactions.
Slow down.  Catch your breath.  Try to find out if it’s really true.  (oh, and the news about me was not true J)

:31 So the king arose and tore his garments and lay on the ground, and all his servants stood by with their clothes torn.

:32 Then Jonadab the son of Shimeah, David’s brother, answered and said, “Let not my lord suppose they have killed all the young men, the king’s sons, for only Amnon is dead. For by the command of Absalom this has been determined from the day that he forced his sister Tamar.

:33 Now therefore, let not my lord the king take the thing to his heart, to think that all the king’s sons are dead. For only Amnon is dead.”

:32 only Amnon is dead

Jonadab somehow knows that his friend Amnon was the only one killed.  I wonder how he knew?

Somehow, I get the feeling that Jonadab isn’t a nice person to be around.

The real news was bad enough, but the story got stretched.

:34 Then Absalom fled. And the young man who was keeping watch lifted his eyes and looked, and there, many people were coming from the road on the hillside behind him.

Absalom knows he’s in trouble and leaves the country.

:35 And Jonadab said to the king, “Look, the king’s sons are coming; as your servant said, so it is.”

:36 So it was, as soon as he had finished speaking, that the king’s sons indeed came, and they lifted up their voice and wept. Also the king and all his servants wept very bitterly.

:37 But Absalom fled and went to Talmai the son of Ammihud, king of Geshur. And David mourned for his son every day.

:38 So Absalom fled and went to Geshur, and was there three years.

:38 went to Geshur

Play Geshur map video.

Geshur overlooks the Sea of Galilee, about 80 miles from Jerusalem.
It was a pagan city in David’s day.  In Jesus’ day, it was known as the city of Bethsaida, the home of Peter.

Talmai is Absalom’s grandfather, the father of his mother Maacah (2Sam. 3:3).

When Absalom is in trouble, he flees to a place he considers safe – grandpa’s house.

:39 And King David longed to go to Absalom. For he had been comforted concerning Amnon, because he was dead.

Eventually David got over Amnon’s death, but David begins to regret not having lost one son, but two.

David is going to be acting in a disciplinary way towards Absalom, but don’t miss the point that David loves his son. He loves him very much.

Lesson

Sowing and reaping

We are seeing the consequences of David’s sins begin to appear.
David’s sons have learned from their father.
David committed adultery. Amnon raped his sister.
David killed Uriah. Absalom killed Amnon.

14:1-20 The Woman from Tekoa

:1 So Joab the son of Zeruiah perceived that the king’s heart was concerned about Absalom.

Joab is David’s nephew, and the commander of David’s army. He himself is also a murderer, having been the one who murdered Abner in revenge for his brother Asahel’s death (2Sam. 3:27). He is Absalom’s cousin.

Joab seems to really want to help David. He sees that David is miserable and thinks he has a solution.

:2 And Joab sent to Tekoa and brought from there a wise woman, and said to her, “Please pretend to be a mourner, and put on mourning apparel; do not anoint yourself with oil, but act like a woman who has been mourning a long time for the dead.

:2 Tekoa (play Tekoa map video)

Tekoa is a city of Judah, about 10 miles south of Jerusalem. The birthplace of the prophet Amos.

:2 wisechakam – wise, wise (man); skilful (in technical work); shrewd, crafty, cunning, wily, subtle.

This is the same word used to describe Jonadab (2Sam. 13:3).

:3 Go to the king and speak to him in this manner.” So Joab put the words in her mouth.

As the king, David was the final judge of things in Israel. He regularly had to listen to peoples’ stories and make decisions. We saw back in 2Sam. 12:1-4, when Nathan came to David and told him a story, that Nathan used this to get David to use his own wisdom against himself.

Joab is going to use the same tactic as Nathan.

:4 And when the woman of Tekoa spoke to the king, she fell on her face to the ground and prostrated herself, and said, “Help, O king!”

:5 Then the king said to her, “What troubles you?” And she answered, “Indeed I am a widow, my husband is dead.

:6 Now your maidservant had two sons; and the two fought with each other in the field, and there was no one to part them, but the one struck the other and killed him.

This is the situation – one brother killed another brother.

:7 And now the whole family has risen up against your maidservant, and they said, ‘Deliver him who struck his brother, that we may execute him for the life of his brother whom he killed; and we will destroy the heir also.’ So they would extinguish my ember that is left, and leave to my husband neither name nor remnant on the earth.”

The problem is that some of the family wants the murderer to be put to death, but that would leave the woman without any sons.

:8 Then the king said to the woman, “Go to your house, and I will give orders concerning you.”

“Go home and I’ll let you know what I decide …”

:9 And the woman of Tekoa said to the king, “My lord, O king, let the iniquity be on me and on my father’s house, and the king and his throne be guiltless.”

:10 So the king said, “Whoever says anything to you, bring him to me, and he shall not touch you anymore.”

:11 Then she said, “Please let the king remember the Lord your God, and do not permit the avenger of blood to destroy anymore, lest they destroy my son.” And he said, “As the Lord lives, not one hair of your son shall fall to the ground.”

:11 the avenger of blood

Not like these Avengers (show movie pic)

This is about the blood feuds, like the old Hatfields and McCoys.

If a family member is killed, the family was duty bound to take revenge.

:11 not one hair

David grants the son a full pardon.

:12 Therefore the woman said, “Please, let your maidservant speak another word to my lord the king.” And he said, “Say on.”

:13 So the woman said: “Why then have you schemed such a thing against the people of God? For the king speaks this thing as one who is guilty, in that the king does not bring his banished one home again.

:14 For we will surely die and become like water spilled on the ground, which cannot be gathered up again. Yet God does not take away a life; but He devises means, so that His banished ones are not expelled from Him.

:14 His banished ones

David ought to show his own son the same compassion that he has shown towards this woman’s son (if she has one).

:14 like water spilled on the ground

Lesson

Make things right before it’s too late

We are all going to die, and then it will be too late to be reconciled to people.
Don’t let it your pride stand in the way of making things right.
When people are dead and gone (like water spilled), you will regret not making the effort to reconcile.  Even if you don’t succeed in reconciling, you will know you tried.

:15 Now therefore, I have come to speak of this thing to my lord the king because the people have made me afraid. And your maidservant said, ‘I will now speak to the king; it may be that the king will perform the request of his maidservant.

:16 For the king will hear and deliver his maidservant from the hand of the man who would destroy me and my son together from the inheritance of God.’

:17 Your maidservant said, ‘The word of my lord the king will now be comforting; for as the angel of God, so is my lord the king in discerning good and evil. And may the Lord your God be with you.’ ”

:18 Then the king answered and said to the woman, “Please do not hide from me anything that I ask you.” And the woman said, “Please, let my lord the king speak.”

:19 So the king said, “Is the hand of Joab with you in all this?” And the woman answered and said, “As you live, my lord the king, no one can turn to the right hand or to the left from anything that my lord the king has spoken. For your servant Joab commanded me, and he put all these words in the mouth of your maidservant.

:20 To bring about this change of affairs your servant Joab has done this thing; but my lord is wise, according to the wisdom of the angel of God, to know everything that is in the earth.”

:19 the hand of Joab

David knows he’s been had. He figures it must be Joab. I think Joab must be standing in the room with David and the woman.

:21 And the king said to Joab, “All right, I have granted this thing. Go therefore, bring back the young man Absalom.”

Joab has been in the room while the lady has presented her case.

:22 Then Joab fell to the ground on his face and bowed himself, and thanked the king. And Joab said, “Today your servant knows that I have found favor in your sight, my lord, O king, in that the king has fulfilled the request of his servant.”

:23 So Joab arose and went to Geshur, and brought Absalom to Jerusalem.

:24 And the king said, “Let him return to his own house, but do not let him see my face.” So Absalom returned to his own house, but did not see the king’s face.

:24 do not let him see my face

David has allowed Absalom to return, but he will not allow Absalom to see David.

We were told earlier that “the soul of king David longed to go forth unto Absalom …” (2Sam. 13:39), so we know David misses Absalom.

But David must not think that it would be proper to fully restore him.

It is possible that David is unsure of restoring Absalom. He had his arm twisted into letting Absalom come back. You could probably make a case the Absalom had only carried out the Law in having Amnon put to death, but you could also probably make a case that Absalom was a murderer.
Either way, David decides that though Absalom can come back, he isn’t restored fully to the king.

14:25-33 Absalom is back

:25 Now in all Israel there was no one who was praised as much as Absalom for his good looks. From the sole of his foot to the crown of his head there was no blemish in him.

Absalom was a good looking guy. He is a strong, forceful person. He’s popular with the people.

:26 And when he cut the hair of his head—at the end of every year he cut it because it was heavy on him—when he cut it, he weighed the hair of his head at two hundred shekels according to the king’s standard.

:26 two hundred shekels

About five pounds of hair. A lot of hair. Absalom was a good-looking and hairy guy (like a cross between Fabio and Brian Wilson’s beard). His hair will get him into trouble later.

:27 To Absalom were born three sons, and one daughter whose name was Tamar. She was a woman of beautiful appearance.

It seems that Absalom names his daughter after his beautiful sister.

It would seem that Absalom’s sons died before he did –

(2 Sa 18:18 NKJV) —18 Now Absalom in his lifetime had taken and set up a pillar for himself, which is in the King’s Valley. For he said, “I have no son to keep my name in remembrance.” He called the pillar after his own name. And to this day it is called Absalom’s Monument.

:28 And Absalom dwelt two full years in Jerusalem, but did not see the king’s face.

It’s now been a total five years since Absalom has seen David.

:29 Therefore Absalom sent for Joab, to send him to the king, but he would not come to him. And when he sent again the second time, he would not come.

:29 he would not come

Joab is Absalom’s cousin. Joab never returned Absalom’s calls. It’s possible that he has begun to feel like David, that he needs to distance himself from Absalom.  Or perhaps he feels like he’s already overstepped himself by helping Absalom out.

Lesson

Speak up

Sometimes we can get into trouble by not speaking up or by not answering when we should.
Illustration
Holding A Grudge
One day a visitor leaned on the old fence around a farm, while he watched an old farmer plowing with a mule. After a while, the visitor said, “I don’t like to tell you how to run your business, but you would not have to work so hard if you would just say, “gee” and “haw” to that mule instead of just tugging on those lines. The old farmer stopped and pulled a big handkerchief from his pocket and wiped his face. Then he said, “Reckon you’re right, but this animal kicked me five years ago and I ain’t spoke to him since.”

:30 So he said to his servants, “See, Joab’s field is near mine, and he has barley there; go and set it on fire.” And Absalom’s servants set the field on fire.

This is one way to get somebody to answer your call.

:31 Then Joab arose and came to Absalom’s house, and said to him, “Why have your servants set my field on fire?”

:32 And Absalom answered Joab, “Look, I sent to you, saying, ‘Come here, so that I may send you to the king, to say, “Why have I come from Geshur? It would be better for me to be there still.” ’ Now therefore, let me see the king’s face; but if there is iniquity in me, let him execute me.”

Absalom doesn’t see what good it has been in coming to Jerusalem. He wishes he’d stayed in Geshur. If David doesn’t like Absalom, then he should kill Absalom.

:33 So Joab went to the king and told him. And when he had called for Absalom, he came to the king and bowed himself on his face to the ground before the king. Then the king kissed Absalom.

:33 the king kissed Absalom

Absalom is restored to David.

It’s all good now … but the worst is just around the corner …